Sampe query

Sample Query Letter

Brown Ink Books, LLC
January 11, 2010
5806 Symmes St.

Dear Mr. Brown Ink

I believe you, as a well established and experienced agent, would be interested in my most recent piece of writing. Standing at twenty pages, double spaced of course, is a sample chapter for my upcoming book entitled Smok3 Crack. None of my works have yet been published, although throughout my many years of writing I’ve been acclaimed by famous elementary school english teachers such as Mr Pierce and Mr. Fortuna as "Interesting", "Not bad", and "Decent". Novelist Chuck Palahniuk responded to my Lullaby extension with "Please stop sending me this. It’s not funny anymore". This clearly demonstrates his acceptance of me as a new man, one who’s left the lighthearted "comedic" writing in to something so in depth and captivating that even a dark humoured Palahniuk can’t take it anymore.

This sample chapter doesn’t blatantly impede on any famous fiction writer’s writing style, using a technique developed by many hours in my saline meditation tank. It strays from cliche, being about topics most people wouldn’t think to write about, such as love, the troubles of growing up, drugs, and how hard life is for rich white kids in North America.

The reading of this chapter will lead the reader to believe the book will be about drug addiction, but really the story has nothing to do with drugs at all. The substances are actually a deep metaphor for the hard times a suburban family needs to go through, such as half cooked spaghetti and BMW payments, augmented with a deep dialogue exhibited through the protagonist’s use of clever wordplay such as "What the fuck, dude?".

Smok3 Crack is a complicated love story set in southern California. Like most love stories set in California, the main character’s name is John. This book stands alone from the crowd in that in can be marketed as both a children’s story and as a novel that adults and elderly of all ages can enjoy. A character in the book sells oranges, and all kids love to eat oranges, you can cut them in to smileys. 22% of the population is over 52, and 100% of people over 52 love stories about teenagers experimenting with drugs they think Satanists consume before sacrifices.

As a young Canadian writer, I’m interested in an agent based in Queens. Luckily enough for you, your agency has caught my attention as a well developed and intelligent group of people who would surely jump at the idea of publishing this unedited copy immediately in a magazine or in university diction. The sample chapter is currently four thousand godly words. I’d ask if you’d like a copy of the chapter, but I’ve sent one along anyway as I already knew the answer would be yes.

Sincerely,

Matt Steel